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 我不知道我需要多长的时间才可以真正的把你忘记，我不知道我还是否有想你的勇气。但是，我知道我的这份爱，这份心痛，将会陪伴我一段很长很长的日子。 Easy&Simple. With♥, SERINE. NGMINFEI 谢谢你给我的一切 . Always had a place in my heart♥ |
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Monday, May 25, 2009  this the first time. i shouted at you so loud. im getting out of control. im getting fed up. im getting crazy. why everything seems so far. why everything seems to fade eventually. im breaking down soon. it's not easy to move on. to all my friends. i know minfei have died. i should not miss him anymore. he'll not bring me the happiness that i wanted. do you all think that i don't know. i know it. i have face the fact that he's gone. forever gone for my life. & i wont give a damn to those "fuckers" who said those comments. i really never take it to heart. i know he's a super good boyfriend to me. he's super caring, super understanding. & i've heard it. & i know it. he's a rare guy that is difficult to find. everybody have been telling me, even my family. but i just wanted u all to understands. it's become a stress unknowingly. it's not that i want to initiate a break-up. i know u all dont want me to regret in the future when it's gone. i know the feeling already. the one i loved, not even break up. have already committed suicide in front of me. i've regretted. really regretted. but will he come back. no, he wont anymore. what more i cant take it. i wished to move on too. but it's not as easy as it can be said. & i regretted accepting you in the first place. if not, i wont be hurting you so much isnt it? feeling is fading away. & i cant feel the love already. i know you love me alot. but do you all know how i feel? even myself also don't know! the dilema i'm stuck. i just dont wish to hurt anyone anymore. those words. really stress me alot. do you think i want to keep everything to myself? if u once told ur boyfriend. every problems that leads to quarrels. & just straight forwardly say everything. even shouted at him. but end up, we quarrelled. & thus, he've jumped down & died. & maybe it's my words that killed him. & if we never quarrel, would he go do silly things. yahs. till now, im still blaming myself. the feeling really sucks u all knows? i know he wont do that, but it've become a fear in my heart already. & it's difficult not to miss minfei. about today's matter. im really chengxim in you le. i hope u can change really. & not worst & worst. sometimes, sorry isnt the word anymore. i really dont wish to care anymore already. & jiayous bahs. just dont gamble already. it'll destroy you one day. we can help once; but not forever. & jason, dont call me 'bi' anymore already. im sorry. give me a break bahs. i've enough. |
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