-at changi airport toilet(:-

deardear!
im here to update my blog(:

ahhas. i just woke up from my sleep.
& now is raining heavily uhs.

alrights; shall update about yesterday(:
kakak is going back indo for 1week. cause she's going back to visit her family.

hmms. woke up around 9plus am. kana awake by kakak & mama.
cause she needs to reach airport at 11am. & i force myself wake up.
went to bath, prepared. & waited all to be ready.
& papa came to fetch us go to airport..
my sister, kakak & me sat behind. & the weather is damn hot de.
but then still windy though.~
reached there around 11am. & papa parked his lorry outside waiting for us too.
while i & my sis accompanied kakak go inside(:
also went to find her check-in point & what time does she needs to check in.
around 11plus, i & my sis left the place. cause my father cant park too long outside.
have took pictures before we left(:





after that, papa fetched us home & before that, went to market & mum-mum.
rest awhile at home(: & have a nap.
around 4plus pm, woke up by my mama. & she's going out. nobody's at home then.
charbo called me & ask me to go changi airport once again~
& im reluctant to go at first de. cause lazy~ but at last cause alone at hm also very sian.
then make my way down to meet her & her friend.
meet them at t2, charbo came down to bring me(:
& went to smoke first then meet her friend, name andrew uhs? lols. nice knowing him toos.
talk about tattoos.. & job toos. he recommended me some ideas of what to put.
but he still encourage me not to put any tattoos for girls. but i've already decide lerhs.

slacked around 6plus. & off he go as he's rushing for time.
while i & charbo decide to go to boonlay find aunty at anson house(:
thought of buying some food go up cook, at last drop off the idea.
went to ntuc bought eggs & 1bottle green tea for aunty. while i bought maggie mee, & sushi.
then went to ta-bao food for ourselves; & walked to auntie's house.
andrew&co was there as usual. lianheng, weihao was there toos.
slacked & chatted with with the guys, while charbo ply mahjong.
then thought of going home, but try ask my papa come to fetch me.
& thus, he agreed. so i followed anson,weihao&lianheng go outside walkwalk(:
cabbed down to find lianheng girlf. & talked awhile. & she went home.
then we went kopitiam, buy ciggie & also makan at there.
talked alot. & they've asked about your things.
& they're afraid that i'll cry, but i told them i'll be fine.
maybe i'm getting used to the pain already. & i know that u wont want to see me cry isnt?
around 11plus pm. we cabbed back to anson house.
& chitchat with the taxi uncle on the way & he wait us to smoke finish before we board the cab.
slacked around at anson house(:
anson went to lianheng house & ton; while weihao went home.
& i accompanied charbo at there & wait for my papa to come.
cook-ed maggie mee for charbo uhs. hahas. thought i cn ton cause my papa is asleep.
but halfway, he called me & say he arriving. x.x
thus, said byebye to charbo. & went down to wait for him.
went to geylang to eat & also do some stuffs with papa & sis.
& home sweet home!~ :))

& today. i'll be staying at home. good girl rights.

baby uhs;
next week. i've arrange one day that all of us would go visit you.
cause it's also their school holidays. & mostly are free during next week.
& guess they've alot words to tell you also; i also have alot of words to tell you toos..

alot of people have been asking me. whether i've recovered?
or why i looks like i've recovered completely already.
& praising me that im strong. can withstand this kind of things happen.

i've once thinking going with you~
i've once thinking of ending my life.. & stop all this miserable~
but if im gone. who'll be the one's sad? & i've think about your loved ones inculding myself.
the impact on us that we've to face that u're gone..
& ur parents~~ it's pointless isnt it?

i think that u should understand rights?
i knows that u hate/dont like to see me sad & cry when u're alive.
& i'll believe that when u're up there, u wont want see me in that state too rights?
i cant be crying forever? i cant be toturing myself forever?
though sometimes. when im thinking of you~
things get out of hand. & i'll cry like nobody's business. but at least.. i've tried to be happy once(:
i knows myself the best.
that incident would forever be tattooed in my mind.
your images & your everything would be forever tattooed in my heart.
& your name would be soon tattooed on my body(:
im not silly. i know it's forever. at least i've put it for a meaningful reason.
& it's also have the reason that u're forever be remembered...

your every moments with me. everything that make me reminds of you.
would always be remembered by me~
those sweet & happy memories. even those sad & hurful memories.
it's worth to be kept~ at least i know we're once sweet together..

but if u never know me; maybe u'll still be here alive bahs..
if times could reverse; i would never regret knowing you~
but i'll never do silly things again.
& i'll not say those words to hurt you again..
& i'll never turn back on you....
baby; how about you? have you ever regret? hais.
i miss you so much you knows?
i really miss the times that u're beside me~

been missing you so much this few days. hais.. but i knows. no emo-ing rights?
as i promised my friends & i know you wouldnt want to see it toos.
im getting so fucking irritated by someone.
i mean the feeling really~ omg de!
& i dont need your sympathy. if you want to get any returns from me.
im sorry, i wont accept you. cant take it, simply fuck off.