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 我不知道我需要多长的时间才可以真正的把你忘记，我不知道我还是否有想你的勇气。但是，我知道我的这份爱，这份心痛，将会陪伴我一段很长很长的日子。 Easy&Simple. With♥, SERINE. NGMINFEI 谢谢你给我的一切 . Always had a place in my heart♥ |
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i just still cant face the fact.
Thursday, January 22, 2009 baby. i'm in skynet once again. & yongda become my gandi yesterday. todays is xiaozhu meimei birthday yahs. firstly happy 13th birthday to you! (: i'm sorry that i didnt went to the celebration. cause i'm tired. but anyways. hope u've a fun time with them as while. must last long with andrew kays. chatting with yongda didi & fireboy just now outside. & your fav song 'from this moment on' was played by kunlong suddenly inside skynet. ur flashback just came back at that moment. saying about your stuffs. & u know what? fireboy miss ya alot yarhs. u still owe him a macdonald meal. & he cried when he saw the video of yours. i'm gona make a video of all of us with you. with our individual photos. & yours too. as they never take photo with you before. & also they want to tell u how much they misses you. alrights. going to say what did i do today(: yesterday ton at skynet. then went to school with serene & her bf about 7plus am. they've napfa test while i stone there with huiqin. went to have lecture. but i guess i'm sleeping inside. too tired already. then went for last lesson. but i cant go in due to im wearing slippers. so i sat outside at the study corner & waited for them. fall asleep awhile & emily came. have a chat & both of us went to cafe 2 & eat as we're slightly hungry. & i haven see how's the new cafe2 after renovation. see luhs, overall not bad luhs. after eating. lianni,huiqin&shiqi came to find emily while i went to tech block & meet serene. & she thought of numpang me go boonlay. but cause her father & relative went shopping. thus i went home instead. cause i'm tired. went to fetch her bf first. den went to sengkang. & back to tm. & i'm sleeping inside the car. guess i'm really tired out this time. went to take 23 home. & sleep all the way till 10pm. then went out again. meet yongda didi at lavender mrt. & mrt-ed down to lakeside. meet charbo at bus-stop. & bus-ed down to boonlay market. didi went to play snooker with them, while i & charbo went to find yongkun, xiaozhu & yijie. so went to rounding along boonlay. ride to yongkun house to put his stuffs. & went to meet they all at 677. slack awhile & ride back to boonlay again. in a sudden. as im browsing through your friends blog. & your friendster. & your slideshow. felt a deep pain in my heart. alot of questions ran through my mind. & that day repeats again in my mind. am i really the one who caused your death? am i not understanding enough? if i didnt went back to my house. everything wont happen? i really feel like slapping you now. whenever. im angry with you. u'll ask me to slap you or scold you. im fucking angry cans. im fucking sad cans. im fucking emotional now cans. why you can just leave this world, leave your loved ones, friends & family. putting us in this agony? need to face the fucking fact that u're gone? what you've promise me. u would never leave me alone. will together face all the problems together. is this the solution that u've choosen? even i myself don't know what's the real reason why u choose to jump down! u said before, before u do anything. u'll always think of my feeling?! THEN YET U CHOOSE THIS! it's a big blow for me. FUCKING BIG! the images of seeing you leaped off the building with my eyes. why did you go drinking! normally when we've a small tiff. or u does just to make me laugh. & everything would be fine! but this time. u choose another way. a way that i would never see you again. FOR WHAT? make me remember for you for a lifetime? or what? i hate you ah! i really hate you. everybody saying you're a good guy! if you're good! why you choose this route that making everybody suffers. u think u're gone, everybody would be happy isit? THIS A FUCKING NO OKIES! all miss you alot? u know marhs? U KNOW MARHS!? im really damn pekchek now. im sorry. |
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